super!!!...8

3/18/09

hey everyone. grey again. I am EXTREMELY FRUSTRATED right now... I just spent about 2-3 hours typing about the last few days and somehow it got deleted. i had successfully solved world hunger and figured out cures for all sorts of diseases... but it's all lost now. what do you do?!

basically in a 'much' shortened version (this will be the first & last epic novel of this length, the rest will be much shorter, there was just much to say about these first few):

three days ago, Sunday @ 11:00 a.m to be exact, we (amanda, Brock, buster, michelle, Micah, mama, & daddy) set out from the parking lot full of excitement, through the rain, towards springer mt. There was a .9 mile climb to the beginning and then a .9 mile descent right back down past where we left off from.

at the top, we took some pics, breathed in deep, signed the register, and set out. we got back down to the parking lot where mama (in some newly ruined shoes) and daddy gave encouraging words, took some last pictures together, shared the last hugs, kisses, tears, and goodbyes for a while. We had our initial 'snicker time' and we were gone.

the first day it was rainy and misty, but a good temperature. we made it a good ways, but wound up not getting the miles we wanted... partly because of weather conditions, but mainly because after about 3.5 miles we came to an awesome little creek where we met a guy named chris. Chris told us we were 2 miles further along than we were (nice guy, good intentions, bad with maps). we believed him, he was nice, our hopes were high, and we were conquerors up until this point. so why couldn't we have hiked 4 miles in an hour and a half (common sense should have said take a gander at the map yourself, but we were too giddy). anyway, thinking we were further down the trail, we stopped to celebrate our 'accomplishments', and take in the beauty filled environment.

later we found out we were not where we thought and soon gave a wag of the finger (and no, not what you devilish peeps are thinking, just the kind of finger that a mom wags at her child if he/she is about to do something they shouldn't) towards chris, wherever he was at that point. so, we actually wound up a couple of miles short of the goal at a cozy little campsite beside a creek. that night was fun, it was all new and we were with good friends.

around 3 that next morning, it started raining pretty steady and didn't really stop until 10:30 the following night. it was kind of hard to squelch our excitement after that first day of rain, and even part of the second day... but two days of rain straight isn't the most encouraging way to start such an endeavor... nonetheless... it was a great... that is until...

bad news: that 2nd morning is when Manda woke up feeling nauseous and it went downhill from there for her (actually uphill altitudinally speaking). a mile and a half into the walk that day we came across a logging road, which up until that point she had already lost all of her intestines, but here, thought she could lose a lot more. we decided to let her and Brock stay there while we hiked ahead however far to get cell service to call someone to come and pick them up. this is when we had part ways with amanda and Brock to make sure they were taken care of.

it was hard saying goodbye to mama and daddy of course, but this was also quite a grieving period for me as well, for a number of reasons: manda was deathly sick, the only hiking she and brock got to do or scenery they got to see was hindered by rain or fog, but mainly because they were the last bit of 'home' i had left to reach out and touch (and i'm really close to my sis). to leave them like this was really hard.

a little ways down the trail, half of a mile or so, we were able to get in touch with the people to come and get them (but later we found out that it wasn't until after 4 hours of waiting that they they were actually picked up).

we trekked on. we decided we would try and get as far as we could before we fell down. and we did just that. 7.5 miles later, after the most treacherous climb to date, 1 mile/800 foot elevation rise (sassafrass mt.). the hardest part aside from the sloppy terrain and constant rain, was the fact that there seemed to be no pay off for all of the toil we were going through. where beautiful vistas were supposed to be, there was only the spot to look out, and then an immediate wall of cloud. it was almost torture. all four of us marched on, michelle (poo bear) leading the way, we collapsed at the following campsite... after the sassafrass climb: cooper gap.

that night around 10:30 the fog lifted and the rain stopped. the air cooled and the stars came out. we ate pretty good and went to bed fairly early.

the following morning, we were able to get cell service again, so we called to check on amanda. brock told us she was getting better but she was still in bad shape. We decided that for amanda's sake, even though they were planning on hiking with us until thurs. afternoon, that we would spend that day trying to get to the next forest road and get brock to pick buster and michelle up as well, so that they could get on the road back towards home. since it was going to be later on in the afternoon, they had six+ hours of driving left, and that amanda was starting to feel slightly better, they decided to stay back at the super 8 in dahlonega (that's *del-logena... inside joke - just ask anyone that was apart of all this) that night (tues. night) and wait and leave the next day (wed.).

worst fear: the very thing that I had been praying against since the day that I began planning for the a.t., fell at my feet...literally. i was born with a abnormal foot issue that needed corrective surgery right away, and because of it, i've had issues with it all my life. through all of my sports playing in middle-high school it gave me a lot of problems... but was ok by lunch the next day. the downside: my right foot is limited in flexibility... where the left foot can pivot just like everyone elses', my right foot has toe down - toe up movement only, and even that is limited. basically what happens when i try to make my foot move in ways it can't it hurts, and then when i continue that pattern beyond that, the muscles around my ankle begin to tighten to prevent any movement at all. so... on day two around mile 3 it began aching, usually it will perform after it starts hurting for quite a while, but after the limit is pushed, it begins to lock up. at mile 7.5 it was shut down. i was used to this happening, but what I was praying for was that when it happened each time, that recovery would be swift. i was hoping that this would be different... you know... because i felt like i was supposed to be out here. i thought that maybe because of extremely supportive boots as opposed to baseball cleats, and mostly by His grace, things would be different than then.

day 3: we had 4.9 miles to get to gooch gap, where u.s. forest road 42 cut across the a.t. and where brock was going to be waiting on us. we woke up to a beautiful day, around 45 degrees that morning with the wind blowing just a little bit, and not a cloud in the sky (you have to understand that when you carry 40+ lbs of food, clothing, and shelter on your back up and down mtns. it doesn't take long to warm up). the high that day rose to around 60. it was a perfect day for hiking and we had a short, somewhat relaxing stroll ahead of us.

for me, this was my worst day yet on the trail. i woke up that morning with my foot aching and not wanting to flex at all. after some stretching, blood began to flow and it felt a little better... for a half-mile or so. after that it was really punishing. uphills- on my muscles that i haven't worked on a whole lot in the last 5 yrs. and the downhills- my joints (ankle) from constant pounding.

we set out and covered some serious land on tues. birds were chirping, scenes were incredible, and this was the first day with no moisture! what a glorious day. even though i had to be waited on every tenth of a mile we were still able to knock out our mileage quick enough to really enjoy long pauses for 'snicker time.' we were able to get to gooch (buster's trail name - sorry brotha :)) gap, 30 minutes early. but for me, by the time that I had gotten here, my ankle was shot. we had decided not long after hiking that day, and the 2nd time we had gotten in touch with brock, that micah and i were going to go in to town with the couples that night, rest. restock, eat large, and get revived.

to be honest with you all, by the end of this hiking day, although supposed to be an easy stroll, i was ready to be amputated and taken home. i was frustrated more than i have been in a long time. something that i have been dreaming about doing for so long, something that i felt like i was supposed to do, seemed like it was the impossible... all of my preparation: for naught. i mean if i couldn't hike more than three days straight at that avg. mileage a day, then... anyway, you get the idea. what really bothered me just as much was that i felt like i was wasting people's time, holding everyone up... especially micah (not for any reason that he made me feel that way, i just thought that). he's big and strong enough to cover all the distance he wants. i felt like, if we weren't going to make it to maine, it was going to be my fault. i didn't want to be the reason he wasn't able to fulfill his dreams.

brock came. we went back to the super 8 in del-logena (where mandy and brock surprised us with our own room). we showered, ate a fat juicy burger, corn on the cob & fries, then blizzards from dairy queen, and then followed most importantly by conversations with family and friends about the road blocks... and truly by the voice of our Maker, communicated by his people that love and encourage well - that He has blessed me to be able call friends, and much more, family - spoke truth and wisdom and revived my passion for this dream...despite adversity. micah reminded me that he is in this with me, and he wanted to do whatever i needed to. we spent the night in the best way that could have been, and it was great.

we waited until this morning and see how the ankle was... and it wasn't... believe me. i looked like... you know when you have sat on you leg or foot long enough for it to go completely asleep and then you try to walk on it, you know how that looks... well that was how i looked this morning. i was grabbing hold of everything i could find trying to make my way around to ease the pain. so we decided to stay one more day in town with our friends and, and then stay in the hiker hostel this afternoon, and tonight. which is why i've been able to tell you guys all of this. today, before we came here, we went and had a huge awesome breakfast on the square, went to the local outfitter and got some insoles and fuel, and then to wal-mart where we restocked some food. from there, they took us back to the hostel where we began, for them to take us back to where we left off in the morning. we said our final goodbyes, and hung out here all afternoon, met some cool people, and took it easy.

the Lord has been gracious and I am now comfortably walking around, and before amanda, brock, buster, & michelle left us here, i was able to send about 12 lbs of my pack back home... so we are hoping...praying for difference.

moral: I have been encouraged to find out what my threshold is and go no more than that each time... do only what i can and not worry about the outcome or tomorrow. i am praying that as i see what my struggle is here, physically, that i am reminded constantly that it's about today, this moment, this journey in the next few steps, and not about the end result...(if that's in Maine, or GA) only what can be done right now to glorify him, not tomorrow.... i pray that this carries over into "real" life for me, and that micah can continue to be enriched far beyond my physical limitations.

thank you all for you thought, concerns, and prayers. you are all thought highly of and very much appreciated.

much love,
g